i_lap_u

含蓄

2011-12-26T07:34:00.000-08:00

道理大家都懂，只是大家能否领悟并把他实行才是最难。

以前，我总是把最直接的感觉讲出来，结果不是每个人可以照单签收。在朋友，工作，家庭，还有感情里也一样。其实大家都爱听，自己想听到的话。若又不伤害他人，合而不为之。

在感情里呢，我会把爱和关心都挂在嘴边，把爱与不爱，对或错都一定得做个了断。认识你后，你告诉我，爱与不爱一旦讲出来后，感觉就没了。渐渐我也体会到，含蓄的爱才会耐人寻味，才会长久。这就好比泡茶一样，慢慢的把茶叶的精华释放到水里，喝完了再泡。

定位

2011-11-15T21:34:00.000-08:00

近来因为妈妈开始传授她那无师自通的投资＂功力＂给我。所以现在我常常阅读报纸上的财经版，商海杂志，还有上网研究股票，房地产等。

当然，不婚主义的我也开始为自己的人生投保了。虽然供得压力，但是必要的。若我有什么冬瓜豆腐，妈妈当然是受益人啦！爸爸应该会偷偷在想我是不是他生的。哈哈！

回到主题，定位，什么是定位？在看过一篇女强人的专访，我开始对定位有了新的见解。无论是工作上或者家庭里，人一旦失去自己的定位，就很容易失去方向，迷失了。在工作上我是一位幕前幕后执行人员，难听点就叫做打杂，上司的助手，客户的听筒。所以每当我开始迷失时，我就会提醒自己，我是个好助理，想想如何帮助上司。同时绞尽脑汁地解决客户的问题。在家庭里，我是一个弟弟的哥哥，好几位堂表弟的榜样，父母的儿子。除了定时回家，就是打个电话关心关心彼此。

从上月开始，我除了是社会上的纳税人以外，也是社会上的义工。加入＂北海斗母宫义工组＂后，开始觉得自己以前很自私，把自己大部分的时间，精力还有金钱只给一个人，却忽略世上还有很多需要我关心，帮忙的族群。所以每个月我都尽量出席会议和活动。我的定位是，当个好组员，好义工。

这么看来，我把金钱，工作，家庭，义工顺序的重新定位并排列，却把自己的感情排在最后。希望接下来的几年里，这种定位可以改变自己的个性，个性改变自己的生活。

寻人启事

2011-11-09T17:13:00.000-08:00

郑欣爰小姐，你好吗？

生活中少了你这个朋友就好像出门忘了戴手表。觉上少了什么，有点不习惯，但一样可以经过手机来查看时间，生活一样的过。

对于你在我生活上的消失，我相信有你的原因，希望你的一切都可以顺顺利利。

再次离别

2011-11-07T22:40:00.000-08:00

最近我身边的同事，上司还有大哥都因为工作而可能暂时离开大山脚。

好巧不巧，即将调来的同事刚好是我讨厌的，想象未来的日子，太可怕了。。。

生日快乐

2011-10-26T07:50:00.000-07:00

妈妈说孩子的生日=母难日，所以除了一岁生日，家人就不曾为我庆祝生日。

自从来到大学以后，才有朋友们为我庆祝。谢谢大家！

出来社会工作后，只有连自己生日都忘了的哥哥和在遥远云姐神秘的送我礼物。讲真的，还真的蛮感动的。反而是越期待的，就越失望。

其实生日也没什么大不了，可能会受到消费礼券，得到亲朋好友祝福。只要能天天保持一颗安稳，平静，知足，感恩，和谐的心就天天都是生日咯！哈哈！

原谅

2011-10-17T06:24:00.000-07:00

原谅别人就是善待自己，但原谅自己就能善待别人？

我把以上的句子上传到面子书那里，结果没什么反应，而且只有被酸的回应。

经过几件事后，我发现要原谅别人比原谅自己来得容易。

可能是因为时间的关系，加上我已了解到谁人不犯错的原理，所以原谅别人没想象中难。

自己犯的错却一辈子跟着自己，不管时间距离的转变。若无法原谅自己，罪恶感就如影随行。

一旦对方和自己都原谅了这一切的一切，我们就和好如初，错的事就不许重犯。

家

2011-10-16T00:17:00.000-07:00

现在社会里鲜少会有三代同堂的家庭了。但我算是幸运的那位。

可能是代沟的关系，生活里的小摩擦是难免的，但这才是完整的家。回到家里吃妈妈煮的，睡自己的房间，虽然没公司家的舒服但却是很安稳睡到天亮，那种温馨的感觉是无法用言语来表达的。

谢谢你爸爸妈妈，让我还有家可以回，还有回家的理由。

聚会

2011-10-01T08:42:00.000-07:00

话说是朋友的聚会，但大家一到场后都不约而同埋头的在刷手上的苹果手机。
聚会?

悲观

2011-09-25T16:48:00.000-07:00

相信吗?大部分的人当遇到问题时都会先冲悲观的角度先出发。我也不例外，而且还是佼佼者。哈哈！

但自从在大学时认识了很多乐观的朋友，我的悲观“程度”有逐渐的减少了。

悲观，忧虑和暴躁都发生在我身上，所以每每发生不顺心的事时，负能量的提高，让自己失去控制。

最近，为了改善自己的悲观，我尝试了多运动，多阅读，还学习冥想。朋友们，大家有什么好建议吗？

病好了

2011-09-21T08:57:00.000-07:00

纠缠我很久病终于都好了，但寂寞的心几时才可以康复？

要找到一个可以相爱到相处的人，谈何容易。有人建议我把目标转移事件，就好比运动，事业，嗜好，义工等。。我相信我可以的。

最近包去求签，得到的解答是。。。没有姻缘，但事业上有进展。哈哈！

病菌远离我

2011-09-14T19:08:00.000-07:00

在长期的失眠下，我终于都病倒了。这一病就病了将近一个星期。

发现吃便药已经不行了，看来等下还是得乖乖去看医生。人到病时，特别需要人陪，关怀，但我还是得天天工作，天啊！！情爱的客户们，就让我休息这一两天吧。。。。。谢谢！

Meeting in Hard Rock Hotel

2011-09-09T18:08:00.000-07:00

今年公司业绩很不理想，在减低预算的状况下，我们来到槟城的Hard Rock Hotel开会。在这三天两夜里，有人埋怨很闷无聊，唯独我陶醉在现场的摇滚乐，当然少不了我的最爱。。啤酒。

经过这次的会议，我跟同事之间的关系更密切了。一起开会设定明年目标，一起玩水，一起喝酒。。。。

云姐

2011-09-06T15:26:00.000-07:00

算一算，我们已经认识了六年之长。每当我觉得度日如年时，六年多还不是一样，静悄悄的过了。

云姐，我们性格相近，所以有时候会比较爱跟你争吵，因为我们彼此都说中了彼此的要害。经过了无数次的翻脸，我们跟了解对方，而更加珍惜这份友谊。

六年了，很多朋友因为环境转变，渐渐的疏远了，就好比那不停直走的列车，朋友们上上下下，唯独你一直留在我那个包厢里。虽然我们在不同地方工作，但每每接到你的来电，我的心很是感动。

希望我们的友情会有更多的六年。。。。谢谢你一直地关心陪伴。

新的开始

2011-09-04T16:13:00.000-07:00

感谢STUPID MONK留言：。。。结束了，就该开始新的生命了。。。

对！结束了，当中也领悟不少事情，人也成长了。告诉自己如果再次遇到同样的处境时，应该更成熟理智的去处理。相反地，如果再遇到类似的问题，我还是像往常的处理，一样的挫折堕落，那么我依然原地跑步，没有成长到。

每每遇到同个问题时，就会问问自己，为什么自己永远是受伤的那位。把留了好几天的胡须剃掉，看看镜子里的自己，为自己加油。想一想，受伤或受益，可能也只是一念之差。

今天，又是全新的开始，加油！

梦醒

2011-09-02T07:39:00.000-07:00

人因梦而存，伟大。

梦想可以是那遥不可及的目标，可以是不符合逻辑的事件。

我是个爱发白日梦的平凡人，常常把现实生活里没办法完成的事带进梦里实现。梦里的我可以很把真实的自己完全表现出来，勇敢地争取自己喜欢的，想要的一切。

梦醒后，心里的空虚是无法言语。那种得而复失，酸酸的，疼疼的，好希望自己不曾拥有过。

该醒的梦，就不应该开始过。不幸的开始的梦，就应该早点结束掉。

陶醉

2011-08-31T01:23:00.000-07:00

喜欢一样东西时，我会欣赏它。

欣赏一样东西时，我会争取它，但往往在争取的过程中迷失了自己。

得到一样东西时，我会很珍惜并陶醉其中，而忽略身边的人事物。

恋爱，就是会让人陶醉，然后开始变傻。

PS：在这里想跟大家分享有关‘醉’的故事：

话说昨晚正当我跟客户哈拉喝酒到很HIGH时，微醉中惊觉自己半个小时前才吃了不少的榴莲。结果半醉的我还得驾车去见下个客户，然后回到家半夜胃痛（因为没吃晚餐）。半睡的医生在我屁股打了一针，还给我药吃。以后还是要小心点好。

下雨天

2011-08-28T00:04:00.000-07:00

在高速公路上奔驰是我生活的一部分。近来雨一下就是下一整天，在驾驶的我格外的吃力，打起十二分精神，确保自己安全到达目的地。

下雨天，我最痛恨死下雨天了。还记得中学时期，常常因为下雨，我得陪着书包，冒着大雨，头低低，加快踩脚车的速度穿梭在雨滴中。到了学校，人里里外外都湿了，功课和课本也湿了。头低低的用眼尾偷偷羡慕那些有家人用车护送到学校的同学。映像最深刻的莫过于SPM马来文预考的那一天，我如往常淋了一身雨，在冷气礼堂里完成考试。

虽然我是这样头低低的度过中学时期，但每每在学校湿嗒嗒的时候，我的心里却是一直燃烧着，告诉自己只有靠自己才能改变这一切。

失眠 2.0

2011-08-24T12:24:00.000-07:00

失眠，失眠。。。。感觉很无奈，看着大家睡得真甜时，唯我独醒。

可能是最近工作上的压力，身心疲劳，但还得拖着疲倦的身体去运动解压。

天啊~~~

焕新，生日快乐

2011-08-10T07:24:00.000-07:00

我是幸运的，从很多方面上我都比你幸运，一路走来都比你顺利。

焕新，虽然我们外貌有几分相似，但我们却是两个不同性格的兄弟。可能是年龄相近，我们一起经历过乡下小孩的童年，求学和现在工作日子。我知道现阶段你没办法满意你的工作，但希望你可以找到你人生的新目标。

谢谢你！还记得自己刚刚来到这人生地不熟的地方工作时，你每晚都带我到不同的地方吃晚餐，路途中还教我这个路痴如何认路。随着日子久后，我有了自己的活动，我们才渐渐减少见面。

嗯。。。。再一次的回家路途中，你对我讲了我很感动话。你告诉我你是因为怕我一个人寂寞才每晚提早放工陪我吃晚餐的。听完后感动到无法言语。

焕新，生日快乐！你已经忙到忘了两年你的生日了，希望你可以过得再开心点。

占有

2011-08-09T09:44:00.000-07:00

我相信，我们都是占有欲强的动物。看上了自己很喜欢，很渴望的东西时，不管花上多长的时间和金钱都会把它买下。但奇怪的是，买回家后却觉得摆在哪里都不对，感觉上制造垃圾，很不环保。

回头看一下，其实我还蛮不环保的。容易的就有新“目标”，一旦到手后就会“脱手”。相反的，若得不到“猎物”时，占有欲会随着增加直到得到为止。我曾问问自己是很需要还是想要，又或者不是很想要。。。。

冷静后，我要成为一位精明的“消费者”。

依赖

2011-08-03T17:17:00.000-07:00

求学时期，我很依赖我的同学，还有身边的好友们，所以到了开始工作后感到孤单而学会一个人在人生地不熟的地方生活。一个人吃饭，看戏，跑步，游泳和逛街。

自从被调到北海工作后，身边多了有哥哥，他的朋友，还有你的陪伴。在这里，每天都过得很充实。我尽量把每一天都填满。也因此，我又找回我的“依赖”。不知觉中已经依赖到变成一种习惯，当没有人陪伴时就特别的寂寞。

我希望可以再借着离开的几天，戒掉对你们的依赖，从新学会独立生活。

失眠

2011-08-02T10:03:00.000-07:00

想一想距离上一次的失眠应该已经有一年又三个月了吧！（如果没记错）

失眠真的是很不好受，在床上，左翻翻，右翻翻，好像什么姿势都不对。

疲累的双眼，但脑海里却是很多心烦的事。那些白天时压抑着的事，夜晚时就好像报仇一样来打扰我。

失眠的夜里，我还可以做什么？

猜测

2011-07-31T05:28:00.000-07:00

最近很心烦，烦到无法用言语表达。

已经好几天都精神恍惚，也开始被你察觉到，但你是否察觉到我的心已经偷偷地为你而打开了吗？

一颗猜测的心，一颗害怕的心，一颗蠢蠢欲动的心。。。你都感受到了吗？

我该怎么办？

心中防火墙

2011-07-21T06:47:00.000-07:00

人，真的是不可貌相。想想当初你给我的印象是个难相处，冷酷，骄傲和自私自利的人。感觉上很讨人厌，而且自己很难和你相处。但随着时间一长，原来我一直误会你了。

我们个性相近，对于生活想法也不约而同。

我们不只拥有共同的嗜好，就连喜欢吃的东西很多都重叠。

我喜欢自然的我，也喜欢这样的你。

我希望这样美好时光会一直停留着，但心里却很清楚这一切的美好的假象会随着你的离开而消失。每每想到这，心中很不是滋味。

害怕再次受伤害的心，免疫系统过于敏锐，心里的防火墙再次把我这颗蠢蠢欲动的心封锁了。

位置

2011-07-17T07:33:00.000-07:00

今年范太岁。事业，家庭和感情上都出现了波动。经过了一段时间，心情也开始恢复正常。

当一切都重新回到轨道时，竟然出现了长得貌似你的人。心中的独白：“怎么会那么像啊！”。更糟糕的是，我每天都因为工作而得跟他联络。搞到我时不时会闪神一下。清醒点！！

这不只是唤醒我对你的想念，也让自己更清楚你在我心里的位置。嗯。。。希望在远方的你会幸福。

变数

2011-05-23T05:56:00.000-07:00

最近常听电台，有个激励性的台词：“世界唯一不变的就是天天在变。”

我变了，你呢？

新生活，新挑战

2011-05-11T13:27:00.000-07:00

凌晨三点，被莫名的恶梦惊醒，却一直睡不回。其实恶梦的原因是因为突起而来的调职，被派到北部工作。

在我公司里被调职通常是因为个人表现不好，又或者相反。困惑的是，我既不是前者亦不是后者，我摸不清状况。但是，这次是比较倾向后者，因为我即将过去那里安排虾苗的事物，是个可以发挥的机会。

机会是难得，但还是会放不下手头上的工作，朋友，同事，尤其是我的上司和客户。感觉上一切又要从新开始过，加油啊！阿晖。 =）

简单的生活

2011-05-08T02:54:00.000-07:00

是否想过当自己觉得时间过得很快时，是因为当下过得很忙很充实？我的答案是：是的。而且可以平平安安过一天，就是幸福。

以前的我总是觉得不满以现状，一直不断向他人要求，却忽略了自己拥有的，所以过得不怎么开心。

以前的我总是觉得幸福是要他人给的，却忘了其实幸福是可以自己给自己的。现在更爱惜自己，关心身边的人，也可以算是幸福的一部分吧。

以前的我总是觉得一个人去吃饭，跑步，游泳，逛街，甚至一个人去看电影是很可悲的事。但现在可能是工作时需要面对人群，所以私下其实还蛮享受一个人的生活。

凡是都可以以“好”“坏”两面来看，简单的生活在众多人眼里是枯燥的，可是对我而言是幸福的。

PS：我想跟我一样过得很幸福的妈妈说：母亲节快乐！！

科技与我

2011-04-10T03:57:00.000-07:00

现今的世界里，人与人的距离因为科技而靠近。但是可笑的是，当你有心想要躲开某个人时，再先进的通讯都没有办法把两个连起来。

人类的记忆是有限的，所以我们开始依赖科技产品来储存档案和记忆。但是可悲的是，当你有心要忘记或删除某些记忆时，再先进的科技也没办法保留这些记忆。

天底下没有不散的宴席

2011-02-28T07:03:00.000-08:00

不知道为什么，一过了年后，滔滔不绝的“惊喜”一直的发生。先是俩两位大学时的好朋友，因为工作而来到SITIAWAN, 但近来一个被派到吉打工作，一个辞职，先后离开了这个小地方。好巧不巧的，我的上司和同事也被吊到其他的地区了，还蛮舍不得的。。。

天底下没有不散的宴席，希望大家好好珍惜生活里的每一天。

矛盾

2011-01-08T05:48:00.000-08:00

一个人身在外地工作，一个人生活，常常会觉得很矛盾：

1）对于周末又爱又恨，真么说呢？期待周末的到来可以好好休息，但经常因为懒得出门，赖在床场看戏，通常一看就是半天了。心里就得寂寞空虚。

2）喜欢自己煮饭烧菜，但懒得准备和清理，要不然就是一个人没办法把煮好的食物吃完，浪费食物。

3）享受逛街，拼命的血拼（血汗钱来的），爱买什么就买什么，好好奖励自己。但一整天下来，钱包贫血。也好，钱没了，工作的斗志又回来了！加油！

4）舒适的居家环境，固然好，放工后可以舒舒服服的休息。但往往我们在舒服的环境时，不知不觉中就会变懒人。

5）觉得单身未婚是种自由，爱做什么就做什么，不用迁就另一半。但殊不知，到了夜深人静时，尤其是最近他妈多的节日，自己却一个人在房里听下雨声。呜呼哀哉！

这些种种的矛盾，经常到了月底就会消失，因为我又要去血拼了！！哟哟！

无形的压力

2010-12-17T06:05:00.000-08:00

自从拿到公司车那天起，我就知道自己的“度蜜月”已经结束了。公司开始分配区域以及客户，工作上了轨道，逐渐增加了。

毕业后第一份工就接触那么复杂的人事物。坦白讲，刚开始会觉得自己好像无意间开错一道门，一道通往另一个很陌生，与过往很不同的世界。觉得自己活在很紧绷，不自然，完全打不上话题的世界。

我的工作算是种技术服务，或者生活化点就像我们买电器时的推销和售后服务，必须拥有高技巧性的沟通，搭配养虾的知识来说服客户，然后很重要的就是“售后服务”，关心和帮助客户达到双赢的局面。我都知道这一切的一切，但我适合这份工吗？我办得到吗？每每想到这些问题，我就会回想当初选择这份工做的原因，就是要趁自己还年轻，没太大负担时，挑战自己。很幸运的，我遇上很不错的上司和同事，那些无形的压力，其实只是自己自找的。深呼吸下。。。。有什么事是过不了的呢？

给自己迟来的生日愿望

2010-11-12T06:14:00.000-08:00

23岁了！！很多人都认为我的外表内在和实际年龄不符。在还没开口讲话时，我的外表告诉大家我不止23，应该很多烂桃花，私生活很糟糕。但交流后认为我的心境还很单纯，难听点就是幼稚。所以，为了迎合“市场需求”我不得不想点你补的方法。渐渐的，我开始每天面带笑容，同时增加自己的心理素质。每晚回到家，躺在床上，心里不停地在呐喊“好累噢！！”

因为自己的表现不理想，上司们在失望之际，绞尽脑汁，把我这头疲累的老牛边拖兼拉的往那又陡又滑的山顶去。心理感到感激又感伤。每晚回到家，躺在床上，心里不停地在呐喊“好累噢！！”

所以我想在这里许下我迟来的生日愿望。。。。我希望我可以有一颗坚强的心，一个聪明伶俐的脑袋，和一个耐劳的身躯！！

生活的意义

2010-10-22T16:03:00.000-07:00

生活本来就是不容易，所以我一直希望可以简单快乐的心来面对每一天。实时是残酷的，现实生活中是无法融入太多阿娇的“太天真，太单纯”。我也发现，很多时候我们为了妥协某些事不得不放下自己的原则。

什么是生活的意义呢？对我而言，就是在迎合他人（社会）和自己的原则中找到平衡点。所以现在每天除了白天工作和晚间应酬的时间，我都尽量做自己爱做的事。。。生活，除了工作还有很多东西等着我们去做的。但大部份的老板都24小时在想着工作上的事，却好像没有了自己的时间。

健康=财富

2010-10-12T07:11:00.000-07:00

近来身边的几个朋友都身体打败战，包括我自己在内。上个星期不知怎样的就病了5天，爆瘦到自己的老豆都投诉，说我瘦到腰都弯掉，人好像忧郁的（还蛮好笑的形容词）。病还好赶在哥哥的毕业典礼前好了，但我的同事昨天因胃发炎而住院。他虽然病了但手上的工作还不停的烦着他，我却都帮不上忙，惭愧又无助，真希望自己可以聪明点，分担同事们的工作量。

希望他早日康复！

公司里的新人

2010-09-30T01:47:00.000-07:00

忙碌日子过得特别快。。不知不觉我已经开始SALES&TECHNICAL三个星期了。同事和上司们对我都还蛮不错的，算是意料之外的事，但是相信每个人都会经历成为公司里新人的阶段。

新人其实有很多优势，就好像身上吊着我是新人的牌，新手上路，不会也没人会责怪。只是这个牌什么时候会被大家拿走，我就不晓得了。希望在P牌被撤走前，自己可以争气点，掌握好工作范围。

相对的，新人也有不少的悲哀。第一，新人好像都没有名字，通常都很难让大家记得自己的名字。第二，新人都认人摆布，不得反抗。第三，言多必有失，所以新人被劝少发言，多观察学习。

每每想到新人生涯的喜和悲时，心中就会播出翁立友的坚持（福建歌）一曲。

“坚定的心伴阮向前走
请你会记着阮的名
有人出世着好命
阮是用生命底打拚
抹惊失败慢慢向前走
运命不是天注定
只是用心来打拚
一定唱出阮的名”

我的国庆日

2010-08-28T23:02:00.000-07:00

国庆日快到了，身为大马公民的我，丝毫没有什么感想，毕竟国庆日也是要开工，没差。虽然说不上自己是爱国人士，但良好公民应该还称得上。不犯法，积极地工作，最重要的是准时缴税！！哈哈！

OK。“我的国庆日” 这篇部落格是要写给我亲爱的爸爸妈妈。一个国家之所以庆祝国庆日是为了纪念国家当时得到独立自由执政。在今年，我已经从父母那里拿到了自己人生的“执政权”了！还记得当年跟哥哥在高中时，会经常在某些事跟妈妈吵。当时以为自己有独立思想及执行的权力，但一天没得到“经济独立”就不算独立。哈哈！

又要开工了！爸妈，我已经独立了，我可以决定自己的人生，我的未来了。谢谢你们...

自我增值

2010-08-20T22:58:00.000-07:00

可能是因为工作上的关系，觉得自己的隐私和私人时间越来越没有了。其中一位朋友兼同事告诉我，我们就好像卖身给公司。其实我比较在意的是有些工事上的“入侵者”进入了我的MSN和FB。搞到我不能随意在网上乱写和发泄！突然间想到我还有BLOG，一个让我宣泄不满和朋友分享的平台。还是学生时代比较单纯。

这个八月真是特别，月头开会，月中上课，所以跟我未来的同事们见面的机会又增加了。每每都会带着几分期待跟他们见面，但这份期待很快就会转换为。。。。嗯。。。（应该要用什么词来表达呢？）就是会觉得自己很渺小，懂得东西太少，该学的东西太多了。SALES真的是分不简单的差事，要兼顾的事项比我预料中的多和抽象。哈哈哈！原以为带着单纯简单的心进公司的心愿应该没办法达到了。有时只想好好做好本分，不想搏出位，但酱很容易就会被他人骑上来，以后就很难抬头。

自我增值很重要，所以也给自己下了几个方向：
1）最主要就是多读，多看，多问和多学有关养虾的资料和水质管理。
2）增强外语：英语和泰语。
3）多了解时事话题。（吹水用的）
4）锻炼EQ。（也是最难得的一项）
5）对自己要有信心。

The road not taken....

2010-08-20T22:55:00.000-07:00

毕业典礼就好像意料中的进行，正是宣布我的大学生涯已经结束了。惊喜的得知之前申请美国的研究拨款（RESEARCH GRANT）已经批准了。这也好像是在意料中的一样，只是人的心却是无法意料。放弃是自己决定的，但造就我的那么坚决决定的原因只有一个，那就是把人世物看得太清了，怕了。。。

准备好向前走！

2010-06-20T16:48:00.000-07:00

工作才刚起步，我会一心专注在职业上，感情那就随缘了。分手后为何藕断丝连？原因很简单，那就是自己对不起对方，忽略对方而觉得亏欠对方。最终，鼓起勇气再和你联络，得到了一直想知道的答案。轻轻的，尴尬的问候，听到你那把熟悉的声音却带着陌生的语气。我问你是如何潇洒的面对分手，而我却还在阴影中，走不出来。你的答案简单得来还真的把我之前的困惑都揭开，你告诉我，当一个人很憎恨对方时，就可以把他忘了。后知后觉的我，没有勇气再继续问原因了。哈哈哈！曾经大家都付出真心，快乐过，到头来还是伤害了彼此。这个时候让我想起神木与瞳也唱过那么一句：。。。。“爱不爱都痛，最后你要自由。。。”
一生中，会有多少次幸福的机会呢？那就要看我们如何去珍惜了吧！嘿。。。在这里除了真心的祝福你之外，还要提醒大家不要忘了对最近夜夜坐在沙发上看世界杯的爸爸们说：“父亲节快乐”。

Working Life

2010-06-20T16:46:00.000-07:00

If every stage of our life as if the chapters in a novel, the chapter of my University Life is satisfactory wrote down, or rather to say I’m begin to compose the brand new chapter---Working Life.

Working life is quite routine and boring. Working environment might be the most important factor for me to consider because my working environmental = my living environment. Frankly speaking, I’m embrace to environment changes but I’m not good in making new friends. In fact, it is not easy to find a ‘good’ and ‘sincere’ friend in working life. Another fact, a perpetual friendship will be fade out by a long time distance. Ah Wan, my ex-housemate have told me before and now my nightmare is coming. Haha!!

I have set a target for myself. I hope to own a house by the age of 30. So, what I can do is just save $$$. =)

毕业感言~~4

2010-06-05T04:42:00.000-07:00

毕业后，为了减少开销，不敢外出一直呆在家里。也因为这样，我发觉了自己能力。哈哈！那就是我的耐心和细心。对待年迈的公公婆婆多了几分的耐心和体谅；对于爸爸妈妈无私的付出也让我发现最好教育方式既是以行动来证明，而不是只是一把口在讲。

一个月前，婆婆因为无心的一跌，让她再次经历动手前后的辛苦。前几天陪着婆婆去医院复诊和做物理治疗，看到婆婆复原的进度，心里也感到安慰。希望婆婆早日康复！！

毕业感言~~3

2010-06-03T23:22:00.000-07:00

有人告诉过我，每当要流眼泪时，抬头望着天空，眼泪就不会留下来。但我告诉你们，那样只能延长眼泪掉下的时间而已，即使眼睛撑得再大，眼泪还是会从眼角溢出。

单身的我，寂寞得很，尤其是夜深人静时。哈哈哈！要如何比喻呢？嗯。。。心中的空虚，似个无底洞，好深好深，是再多的酒也无法填满的。讲到酒，就让我想起我那可爱的妈妈。每每从家乡回去KT时，她都会偷偷的塞几瓶的啤酒给我，很感动。

闲着闲着，我开始上网收集有关理财的资料，开始规划自己的未来。虽然觉得有点纸上谈兵而已，但我会让自己有个目标。能达到那就真的太好了，如果没能达到，那下个月就再接再厉！哈哈！

毕业感言~~2

2010-06-02T08:51:00.000-07:00

毕业了！即将成为社会新鲜人的我同时也是社会新穷人。还不快点开工的话，我的负债不但无法还清，而且还会逐渐的增加呢！希望我可以顺顺利利的，乖乖的做好这份工作。

大学是我最难忘，快乐的时候。朋友虽然不会很多，但谈得来，一起玩的，还不少呢！天生慢热的我，又要从新适应新环境，从新认识新朋友，还蛮头痛的。当然，在每一阶段认识的朋友们，我都很珍惜，希望可以保持联络。

毕业感言~~1

2010-05-06T19:08:00.000-07:00

人生最大的幸福之一就是每天可以睡到自然醒，相信很多人都会同意我的看法。但给我，最满足的是每天可以在太阳刚微微升起时自然醒，打开家里的窗口和门，让早晨的阳光照进家里来。就好像今天一样，心情无比清爽。

感性再加上年纪渐长的我，在毕业到来的前夕，心中有好多好多的感言。哈哈哈！！讨厌离别的我，在近期内必须面对一场又一场的离别场合。。比起上一毕业的离别，这次的感触有更深一层了，经过处理的方法，也发现自己比较成熟了。

人生又到了抉择的时候

2010-04-15T18:51:00.000-07:00

好久都没更新帖子了。每每要开始写时，却不懂如何表达。

几天前，突然接到通知要去面试，紧张害怕的心情难以掩饰。感谢帮忙和鼓励我的家人和朋友，我顺利的得到了这份工。升学或工作？？各自都有好有坏。怎么选呢？最后，我选择了做工。原本只是想打几个月短工的我，突然间改变了一切一切的计划。可能是还没做好心里准备，可能是不舍得读书生活和朋友。。。心里总是闷闷的。

爸爸妈妈，对不起，你们一直都希望我可以继续修硕士，可能又让你们失望了。我今年已经23岁了，但对于自己想要追求的，却很迷糊。但我很清楚，活着，就要活得开心。现在已经选择了做工，就要认真地去做工。祝我好运吧！！哈哈！

A blissfully day

2010-02-09T00:27:00.001-08:00

I already be sick of driving alone everyday.....tired to become a driver to someone else.....now I realize how blissful to be a passenger. Today, I'm going back hometown alone by flight. Even thought the lousy AirAsia somehow change my flight departure time from 4pm to 6pm, I still feel pretty felicity today. It is because I don't have to drive/ride by my own, I have a chance to become a passenger. ohYEAH!

At first, my neighbour NINI send me to KT airport. After that I went to KL Sentral and MidValley by Skybus and KTM. At last, after arrive Alor Star, my father will come to take me home. Oh Yeah!!! What a wonderful day.

Besides, I can escape a week more from KT, escape from my FYP, escape from the life I'm used to be.
PS: Happy Chinese New Year to all of my friends and family!! =)

藕断丝不再连。。。

2010-02-06T00:34:00.000-08:00

寂寞男人又回来了。。。

寂寞男人不懂是该抱着开心喜悦还是意气消沉的心情回来部落格呢？如果我告诉你们我不难过那是假的，哈哈！事情发生至今结果不是最难过的，反而最难过的应该是那个过程，回想起来还会有几分的心悸。

藕断丝不再连了。。。勇敢不怕死的曾焕晖又回来了！化悲伤为力量（不是食量 :P）想一想，胖了五公斤的我是时候减肥了。哈哈！先从不买零食开始，然后尽量把我那小山丘般的薯片，花生，汽水，啤酒。。。送给朋友。谁要？？

First impression > misapprehend

2010-01-26T06:22:00.000-08:00

Have you ever misapprehend someone before?? I think the answer is probably YES. I'm the person who often did it, and even worst recently....sorry to Soo Ping & Xiao Hui, I know you guys will never know I'm apologize to you through my blog....

My new year resolution

2010-01-04T17:06:00.000-08:00

I list out my new year resolution every year. For me, 2010 mean lot to me because within this year I have to decide the way to proceed my future. Ah Wan, my ex-housemate, told me that no matter what way we choose will never be right or wrong.

Before I'm getting busy, I have to list out my new year resolution:

- Complete my FYP as soon as possible.
- Back pack to Vietnam or somewhere else.
- Remove my huge belly.
- Attend my brother convocation.
- Attend my cousin wedding.
- Cherish people I'm loving and caring.
- Get a good job.
- My ex-housemate reunion.

Haha! Happy new year to everyone.

Cheer!! my brother.

2010-01-04T08:18:00.000-08:00

Lately, i notice that my younger brother achieve a big improvement in his skill of drawing.

I love the 2nd drawing. A smiling girl with the title :"微笑度过每一天". I think I have to learn much more from him who ever the optimist. Cheer!! Huan Chin, you can do it!

阿晖寂寞杂记- 4

2009-12-08T21:33:00.000-08:00

寂寞阿晖今天终于吃午餐了，忙碌+省钱的情况下，唯有这样了。算一算，已经四天过这不食人间烟火的日子，又饿又累，家里只剩下是个晚上睡觉的地方而已。这段日子里，寂寞阿晖活在多重压力下的日子，觉得自己好像又老了，憔悴。

还剩下几天新学期就要开始了，但我的研究好像还在原地跑步，一直无法迈向结束前进。另一方面，钱都花玩了，贷款还没来。惨！

以前，压力时会去游泳，不管怎样都会去消消气，解解压。他妈的，这个鸟不生蛋的地方...

深呼吸。。。。。。一切都回过去的。

Black out!!!

2009-12-06T05:32:00.001-08:00

Marine Hatchery is pretty suck!! Always black out!!

Today, in my plan, I should conduct 1 cycle of my experiment. Therefore, I wake up early morning, prepare everything then arrived hatchery before 8.30 am. But when I arrived, not only Marine Hatchery, even Akuatrop also black out. If there is a black out in housing area is still not a big deal. But in hatchery there are million of living organisms been affected without aeration, light, heater or air condition.

Today, almost 1/4 campus was black out, from Marine Hatchery to CIMB area. That mean institute like IMB, INOS and Oceanography are also included. Haiz...I have to postpone my experiment again. Until noontime, Thanks God, Hatchery and Aquatrop have been fixed. Okay, everything seem like fine, and I start to conduct my in Hatchery and Aquatrop. While waiting for the next step, I have go to IMB to prepare buffer for protein extraction. When I arrive IMB, I saw the doors were open widely and there was very dark inside. OMG!! FXXK!! Julius the Science officer try to start a generator to keep the -70C freezer, but fail. Shit!! How about my chemicals inside...

阿晖寂寞杂记- 3

2009-12-02T06:17:00.000-08:00

寂寞男人的可爱金鱼死了。。。。为什么就酱死了。难道你们缺乏爱心吗？

FYP 真的搞到我快要疯了！！！先是用具和仪器不齐全不够用不惯用，要往三四地方跑，要配合每个地方的时间；一个星期只有五天上班的时间，哪里够用哦！！；他妈的使用或借用仪器又要几百个签名；我的鱼又某丁丁死了百多只，很无助彷徨；从叶子变龙珠果皮就算了，还要重复几百遍，他妈的龙珠果现在又难买，但最后在MYDIN终于找到，我还去唐人街的餐馆要，幸好大部分老板都很愿意帮我留着龙珠果的皮，但老板们都不敢保证，因为之前不可以卖冰，所以影响生意；。。。。

要赶写我硕士的GRANT PROPOSAL。。。

另个烦恼又来了，那就是我$$已经山穷水尽，假期大家都吃家里住家里的，还可以打工，但我光是买车票，吃饭，还水电费到来就没钱换上网费，加上他妈的整天下雨又要驾车没机会驾摩托，$$又烧掉了！

一连串的压力和不顺心，搞到我这个寂寞男人就快要变成忧郁男人。希望一切可以快点成为过去。

阿晖寂寞杂记- 2

2009-11-30T15:38:00.000-08:00

寂寞男人这次要跟你们分享一个短片

Bridget Jones's Diary. 好几年看过的一部喜剧，一共有三部，还蛮蛮好笑的，值得一看的。我是寂寞孤单但还没像他那样的可怜。哈哈！

可能日子过得清闲，吃得好，睡得饱，就会产生心旷体胖的效果。怎么裤子有点紧，才发现我在朝向70KG迈进！短短的一个星期多，我已经重了4KG。哇噻！当猪肉卖就好！hehehe! 人是增值了，但钱包却贬值了，是时候控制食量了！！！结果我最近都是自己煮。省钱又健康，不错不错。其实我希望可以在毕业后去背包旅行，所以现在要开始凑钱了，希望可以啦。

想一想，妈妈现在应该已经在去韩国旅行的途中。妈妈最爱旅行了，希望他旅行愉快。我还偷偷的要妈妈买给我好看的T-shirt，嘻嘻！

看到刚买回来的鱼健康，心里就安定了不少。但在这鸟不生蛋的地方经常下大雨，下到我都快要发霉了！！快点晴天吧！

阿晖寂寞杂记- 1

2009-11-28T15:56:00.000-08:00

想要开始我的“寂寞杂记”好几次了，但每次才刚要动笔就打消念头，可能寂寞男人没有什么可以分享的，呵呵！好啦！千里之行，始以足下。

一个星期前，我的鱼无缘无故的都争着要去投胎，阎罗王有那么帅吗？结果，我有点不知所措，幸好阿爰和SHEELA帮我洗鱼缸还有陪我再去买新的鱼。结果连跑了三家宠物店都没货！！最快星期天才到！！屈指一算，哇塞！我要等上一个星期，然后又要再等一个星期让鱼适合环境。再算一算，那个时候还有一个星期就要开学了。天啊！！！！

就在心情低到极点时，她们就安慰我：“你如果早做完FYP，你以为DR YEONG会放过你咩？” 对咯hoh！他一定会说：“HUI， WHY DON’T YOU TRY 。。。”他的那种TRY是你无法拒绝的。

费了一个星期，今天终于要去买鱼，希望可以买到。

PS：昨天我才发现鱼死的原因，可能是ANTI-CHLORINE（好像盐）变质，变得浅灰色，还有它会让水起泡。

Life is full of challenges

2009-11-22T07:37:00.000-08:00

I'm 22, grown up to face lots of problems in my life. I believe we have to be up against with every big troubles in certain moments no matter what.

Now, my task is to finish my final year project with a satisfactory result. So, I can fulfill my 'loving' supervisor's curiosity and let me graduate.

Even though we are not perfect but we can try to make it better and better.

I know there are thousand of challenges in future. Thereby, our life is full of challenges......Cheer!

生活杂记

2009-11-01T08:15:00.000-08:00

这阵子可以用一个或两个字来形容。。。忙和很忙。。。或盲和很盲

已经二十二的我，但看来年近三十了，很憔悴一下。胡子长满脸，头发掉到剩不多。

假期又好像没假期酱，希望早点可以调整里里外外。

人因时间而改变

2009-10-12T15:01:00.000-07:00

曾几何时，你是我想留下来的动力，但现在，你却使我想离开理由。

人往往都会因时间而改变。

如何重拾信心？？

2009-10-11T04:49:00.000-07:00

打从我懂事以来，我就知道自己是个没有自信心的人，所以对以那些自信心爆棚的人就会敬而远之，不时还会偷偷羡慕甚至讨厌他们。多年来的自卑，让我不敢多认识朋友，身体驼背，眼睛望地上看的走路，如果可以的话还尽量加快脚步。

直到来到大学，我的自卑感渐渐的减少了，但对以自己的里里外外的信心还找不到。平凡的我，每当看完“我猜”后，更是自认平凡，没有长处。这几年来，因为经历了班活动的经验，在学业上开始找到了方向，那股来自内心的喜悦和成就感让我信心增加了不少。哈哈！谢谢大学的生活改变了我。

今年，我发现我的生活圈值变小了，可能是把生活重心都放在学业，研究，和少许的朋友上。思想也可能因此而变得窄小，当遇到问题和挫折时就会不知所措，会转牛角尖，结果问题还是问题，没解决到。也因挫折，自信心又淡掉了。信心，我该如何重新拥有你呢？

忙碌的日子终于来了！

2009-10-08T03:23:00.000-07:00

左等右等，我大概两个月前订的chemical，经过了风风雨雨终于到了。。。。这也表示我的FYP也可以开始了。

这种感觉就像女生每个月的生理期一样：是时候了但还没来，就会担心；来了以后，就嫌麻烦。

大考靠近了，小考就赶紧的来了，assignment也一样，还得抽出时间来做FYP。

Last time I've asked my supervisor - Dr. Yeong about the time allocation on my acedemic, research and entertainment. The answer is

acedemic : research : entertainment
45% : 45% : 10%

What the fXck!!! How can live in such life!! Hahahaah!!!

观音菩萨也来当代言人？？

2009-09-29T01:27:00.000-07:00

Lately, we can feel the stress come from economic crisis. For example, I begin for a my related field job from internet....sad to say...the jobs are less, require related experience, low pay.....so I decide to further my study in 'you empty' (UMT).

There was a day when I'm in Marine Hatchery. Suddenly, I noticed a dazzle light came from laboratory room......Without any hesitant, I opened the door and the glint tortured my eyes.....After a couple seconds, I saw a witch was making her experiment.

"Arggghhh.....leave me alone", Witch.

Beside the witch, there was Guan Yin (观音菩萨）. Guess what is this...

Q: Do you what is this??

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A: 观音娘 Artemia cysts.

Walao!!! Guan Yin Pu Sa also can be ambassador ah?? What happend to the manufacture? How can they use Guan Yin Pu Sa picture as the cover and the name of brand. I think la, if she can speaks, she might say:

" Pay me the royalty!!!"

假期杂记

2009-09-20T17:01:00.000-07:00

终于放假了！！我过着一个孤单男子的颓废生活。哈哈！！老实讲还蛮享受的。开始养了一对可爱的金鱼，时不时还会跟他们对话呢！每天醒来就打扫家里，整理整理一下，自己一个在家里开“演唱会”，唱得再烂再大声，也不会有人突然间叫你进去他的房间，然后对你说：“有人跟你讲过你唱歌很‘好听’吗？”。想吃什么，就煮什么吃。原来青菜用水煮会那么好吃。哈哈！每天一早，吃好早餐后，就会到健身房，动一动，想告别我的大肚腩。然后就会去hatchery喂我的非洲鱼，种一下菜。突然觉得原来自己还可过得那么的单纯，心里那份的满足感一拥而出。

我也发现了，自从和你做个了断后，我的原来的性格又回来了。脾气变回又急又坏，耐心越来越差。昨晚跟朋友聊天后才发现原来自己是一个那么糟糕的人，难相处，不妥协，脾气坏，情绪化。。。。我也才发现原来以前到现在我都那么让他讨厌。值得自我检讨的，至少他讲出了我的问题。

在这个假期里，我也发现了好几个朋友，平时跟自己没有什么交际的，突然间会跟我上网聊天。没什么朋友的我，顿时觉得很开心。但是啊！那份开心只是维持了3秒钟。为什么呢？因为他们都是有事相求。另一个呢！怎么讲啊！我以为我们是好朋友，但事实上我们不是，我们只是老朋友而已。好朋友的定义又是怎样的呢？有！他会在你堕落时给你鼓励，寂寞时陪你聊天，烦恼时帮你解愁。。。最重要的！当你堕落时，他不会离你而去，反而会留下，给你加油！陪你一起落泪。还有，他不会要求回报，因为那是为了好朋友。我找到了，谢谢你。。阿爰。

I appreciate what I have now...

2009-09-12T03:07:00.000-07:00

My dear friends and families,

These few days i did not update my blog because I'm pretty busy and things happened to me are beyond words. I don't know how to express via my writing. Hahah!!! maybe is because of my poor writing in English and Mandarin.

Today, I realise I'm the greedy people, who always asking more and more from others, but never notice that how many I already possess. So, I'm very appreciate that what I have now. My very supportive families and my friends especially Ah Yen and Ah Young. You guys assist me to overcome many problems even though certain problems still remain a problem, but you have help me much. Now, I have to try to stop asking help from you guys frequently, and appreciate what you did to me last time. I promise, I will try my best to help you guys. Haha!!

Mama I'm ok already...

2009-08-25T01:09:00.000-07:00

A couple days before, younger brother told me that you have cried after you read my blogs right??

Mama, I'm not intend to make you cry but I hope you can share my problems. In fact, you are the people I always caring to. Sometime I hope I can share something more and more with you.

Mama, I'm very sorry. I make you worry about me always, no matter what. Mama I'm ok already even though my teeth is still pretty pain now. I will cabut it asap. cheer!

一个人的生活

2009-08-23T03:28:00.000-07:00

费着费着，来到这个鸟不生蛋的地方也已经第五个年头了。在这认识了不少的朋友，但大多数都是Hi! Bye! 的朋友，比较好的都已经毕业了。

今天傍晚，看着阿扬和他的同学们一起开心的去吃晚餐，心里好羡慕啊！他们可以和自己同学讨论功课，一起去上课，一起玩，一起完成很多烹饪课程...blablabla.

曾几何时（好自己很老酱，哈哈！），我也有另外四个同学，两男两女。但是他们两个男的，两个女的都很close 而我就那个独来独往的，自己完成很多事，自己一个人的去参加和办活动，孤单又无助，甚至报告慢了一个星期才交都没人告诉我。表面上大家都相处得还蛮不错，但自己心知。

到了现在，幸好还有阿爰你的陪伴，但是还是会很羡慕其他人的大学生活。忙着盲着，我又是一个开车去上课，一个人回家，一个人吃饭，一个人完成很多东西，我已经厌倦了一个人的生活！！！

唉！发泄完后，我又要面对现实，一个人生活。

对不起，爸爸妈妈。

2009-08-19T01:56:00.001-07:00

事情发生已经有一段时间了，昨晚是我第一次打电话给妈妈诉苦。（诉苦？好像有点超过了。恩！应该是告诉）

听到妈妈很唠叨的语气，责怪我乱花钱。但这一切听起来都好舒服，好熟悉。电话另一端的我，嘴角顿时上扬。她是我的妈妈，这世界上就疼我的妈妈。不管发生什么事，无论我变成怎样了，她会毫不犹疑的挺我。就在那时候，我突然好想回家...

想了又想，我终于蜻蜓点水般的告诉她我遇到的问题。妈妈的语气突然间变得很温驯。（哈哈哈！她果然是我妈）这时，我的鼻子酸了一下，拼命在认着眼泪。说完，我就冲凉去。

冲凉后，我的电话又响了，是爸爸。一接起电话，爸爸很紧张的问：“我听你妈说你有那个那个，恩...什么这个这个...什么事？哎哟，我也不懂啦！...” 爸紧张又发抖的声音，让我感动得来又好笑。他试着问我发生什么事但又不敢直接问，兜了好大个圈。（哈哈哈！他果然是我爸）这时，我再也忍受不住了，我躲在房间里，眼泪不停的掉，已经无法在讲话了。好多年了，我一直来都把问题藏起来，把眼泪都收着，好强的我认为哭是无法解决问题的，只会显出自己的脆弱。但昨晚，哭，让我觉得好舒服，好像解脱了。（虽然之前阿爰一直要我哭出来，但我都哭不出来。）

盖了电话，我才发现我有三个未接电话，都是爸爸打来的...

对不起，爸妈，让你们担心了。妈，当你看到我的部落格时，你儿子我已经没问题了。家人永远是我最大心灵支柱。我爱你们，爸妈。

加油吧！曾焕晖。

2009-08-11T06:32:00.000-07:00

不知不觉中，我已经颓废三个星期。曾焕晖，是时候回来了。

虽然我们只是好朋友，但在我心中你是最特别的。不过近几天来，我开始学会拒绝你（虽然心里还是想帮你），生气你（虽然我脾气坏但还是不舍得生你的气）和不再对你有过分的关心了。希望这样的继续友情可以让我们双方都好。

加油吧！曾焕晖。

众人皆醉，唯我独醒。

2009-08-07T13:54:00.000-07:00

After 19 hours 'fighting' with catfish's eggs, everyone is sleeping.....except me. hahahaha!!

But, I'm become a panda now. :( very boring time.....4.58am. Hopefully we can finish this lab as soon as possible. I think I can not tahan already. hehhe!!

Perhaps, I will upload a series photo of fish eggs hatching process...

忙碌的日子

2009-08-06T15:51:00.000-07:00

这几天我开始忙起来了，但我好享受这种忙碌，可能是因此而不会一个人胡思乱想。

这几天我开始忙起来了，但我好享受这种忙碌，因为忙碌的生活比较充实。

这几天我开始忙起来了，但我好享受这种忙碌，因为可以不用天天得面对你却无能为力。

这几天我开始忙起来了，但我好享受这种忙碌，因为我已经害怕得空，孤单寂寞的日子。

虽然这几天我开始忙碌了，但在我的心里深处，偶尔还是会很想你。。。你今天上课到几点？今天会不会很累？这次的LAB会不会，又没有被骂啊？跟coursemates相处得还好吗？有没有定时吃水果？偶尔还是会很关心你，分担你的问题。

虽然这几天我开始忙起来了，但我好享受这种忙碌。：）

The best solution for u and me

2009-08-01T16:17:00.000-07:00

After a couple decadent days, this is the best way to solve the problem between you and me. Honestly, it was pretty hurt when you said it is impossible to let you love me. Even now I also feel hurt when I think back.

I have tried to drink to anesthetize myself. At least I can sleep well that night, the only night. But after wake up, problem still exist, the worst is I was freaking headache on the next day.

So what can I do? just pretend everythings didn't happened before, be your friend, or maybe buddy. The only thing won't be change is my sincere caring to you, my buddy. Thanks. :)

Tumor in my heart

2009-07-29T03:47:00.000-07:00

You are such as a tumor in my heart. Silently but lethal.

You occur in my heart without any aware. senseless but painful.

You have accompanied me for a year. harmonious and gladly.

You grow day by day become deadliness. helpless and struggle.

You mesh up my life. I become emotional and no longer rational despite you have gave me lot of illusional's great time before.

You have woke up my hibernated heart, make it active but somehow you have hurt it whereafter it.

Whenever you influence me, I also don't know what should I do. Until the day I have diagnose your exist. In order to save my heart, I have to proceed a series of surgeries, to take out you from my heart. I know things will not being easy but I have to.

My friends, bless me able healing and get well as soon as possible. :)

The greatest gladness of all

2009-07-12T19:30:00.000-07:00

Recently, I realize that the greatest gladness is not from what I have achieved but is derived from the people who I’m really caring to. Last time, I thought this statement will only existed in typical Taiwanese drama. Now, I believe it. haha!!

LI again

2009-04-24T15:12:00.000-07:00

hi!! i will going to Mersing, Johor for my 2nd times internship. :)

Am I 21??

2008-10-28T08:08:00.000-07:00

Wah!!! I’m 21 already. Is it implying that I’m ‘adult’? Can make any decision by my own? Am I able to be an autarkist?????? Independence?? No!!! Impossible!!! Ridiculous!!! Hahaha!!! I’m still act like a teenager, sometime even don’t what should I do or what I am doing. (It is not an excuse to admit I’m 21)

What suppose an adult should do? Start having responsibility, my future resolution, try to control my emotion well, or blablala…..This is what I think. But for someone, they are going to be other’s father or mother if they are luckily or unluckily, perhaps. Hahaha!! For me, I’m still single and even not yet in relationship with someone. Still having a fool and talk nonsense with the fellow – Ah Hien.

Let me review what I have done within 1 year. Erm…..worked in a terrible hatchery, join the turtle research and rehabilitation activity, further my study in UMT, and start learning Le Français. Oh! Ya. I had join the language festival, take part in advertisement category and stupid French drama.

'Bonjour. Comment çava? Je m’appelle Ah Hui. J’ai 21 ans et je parle Français un peu parce que j’apprends Le Français en situation au UMT avec mon ami Ah Hien. Je veux apprendre bonne. mechi et au revoir. '

I know it will be very tough after this, but I always remind myself 'everything will be ok' or 'nothing impossible'. sound like a idiot. :) I'm ready for challenge!!

back to the reality

2008-08-04T01:41:00.000-07:00

hi!!! everyone. maybe some of you may ask where is ah hui?? how is he?? why he didnt update his blog anymore???

the answer is.......

he is almost die.....

after enjoy my two and half months holidays, I have to back to the reality..... back to UMT again.

many things is going to change....aiiiii!!! i cant imagine the life after my 3rd year friends are graduate next year....

gtg....

ps: thanks for everyone who come to my convo ....TQ!!

I'm proud of you ---- Alor Star

2008-06-10T20:17:00.000-07:00

hahah!!! click the link below, you will know why I'm so proud of Alor Star.

http://www.investasiapacific.com/Awards.htm#Smallcityaward

Actually I also get no idea why............but cheer Alor Star!!!!!

I'm ok

2008-05-23T05:18:00.000-07:00

Hi! everyone. I'm here to let you all know I'm still alive and will heading to Pulau Redang again to be a volunteer to save the turtles tonight....... Plus! I'm stop working in the hatchery last 2 days ago and if anyone wanna know what my lousy boss did to me and other foreign workers, just leave your comment, i will let you all know soon (after back from Redang ,maybe 10 days later)....

A tale of a bitch with 6 puppies

2008-04-09T03:04:00.000-07:00

Nowadays, the population of the dog is increasing abruptly in the earth and it will exceed the human being in the year 2010 estimated by Prof. Chan (don't doubt, is me :) hoho!). This credibility information imply us that doomsday is coming......

The tragedy that have been happened in 5, Taman Mutiara Terengganu state these few days, show us the infraction of the overpopulation of dog is tend to detrimentally.
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Because there were a bitch with 6 puppies barking and clawing in the house!!!! 3 of the innocence resident have been forced by the dog to move away their lovely house.......

The terrible incident will spread over whole earth....maybe begin from their neighbour......

tired.........

2008-04-04T07:03:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone!!!a very long time didnt update my blog since im busy and had my industrial training in kuantan.

I have passed up my LI report last 2 days.....that mean im free!!!!graduate!!!but i still cant feel the joy of it.aiiiii......maybe it's the time to say goodbye to my certain coursemates.....anyway, i wish all of my best of luck....

tired.......

3 days 2 nights with Ah Hien

2007-12-27T22:19:00.000-08:00

Ah Hien was coming to visit me and stay at my house last 2 days. He did many crazy things to make this trip more unforgettable.......hahaha

First day

After taking him back to my house in the early morning, we were continue to sleep. Around 9.30am, we were awake and called yun sing come out for breakfast.

while waitng for yun sing

Here she is!!! This curry mee is not as delicious as she said, but anyway it really make me stomachache in the next day. haizzzzzz

After that, we go ahead the 'unique' building -- Paddy Museum

Look at the silly fellow.

The mural painting is really lifelike and it is depicture the life in Kedah. Despite, the poor maintenance of this building is disappointed us like the sits is suppose moving slowly to let all visitors viewing whole picture but it is not function.

Suddenly, Ah Hien noticed......

The testis of the statue.......hahaha

For your information, the Paddy Museum is very near to a elephant-like mountain --- xiang yu shan. We were not going to jungle tracking, adversely just bought some crystals.

After 45 minutes to north, we arrived Kangar to meet our coursemate -- hooi sean

I forget what name of this stuff... quite ho jia!!!

ahhhh!!! look at my eyes! What was happened??? Guess

5

4

3

2

1

actually not special lah. We went to the snake house, both of us are snake phobia so.....hahaha

Next is Gua Kelam.haha

It's pretty dark inside the cave...

Nevermind, Ultra man and 'baja hitam' is coming. Chiang X3....

It is deserve to spend half an hour to go there from Kangar.

Ah Hien and Sean before leaving Perlis.

This trip are really rush, so without back to my house, we go through to 'Hai Tao Ki' to take dinner with Even.

My favourite dishes fried oyster..

The first is haven't finish yet.Haha!! we continue sembang kuat at Old Town Cafe.

2nd Day

Laksa and ice kacang are really delicious dishes at Lorong Sharif. But both of us were 'lao sai' in the morning, therefore not dare to eat it...

'Leh Hu Bao'

And also the two Maxico Bun.hehehe!!

In the afternoon, we went to Yi Le....

Salad you tiao

Cha Ye Dan

Mi Guo Xi Mi Lu

Yun Sing make the tea - Dong Shan Ji Ping

In the everning, we went to Ji Tiao Luo ( Second Road)

Lok Lok

Erm.....Ho Jia

Telekom Tower

Simpang Kuala -- Night market and San Gai

We are really really tired

PS: Sorry!! I'm very rush for going to Kuantan tonight for practical. Bye Bye

video in NS Camp

2007-12-24T05:35:00.001-08:00

I be cheated by my friend. He asked me to do some poses to catch the photo, but......he was taking video instead.

香水味

2007-12-22T17:45:00.000-08:00

昨晚后，我第一次发觉香水会有这般的魅---只因为你。

你轻轻的给了我一个友谊的拥抱，你身上的香水味一直停留在我衣上，很舒服。

虽然香水味会渐渐消失，但我会期待下次。

My picture in National Service camp

2007-12-09T21:22:00.000-08:00

After 3 years since we leaving the NS camp, I just get the photo we took within the 3 months in the camp. TQ Ah Thye and Ah Han, they passed me these memorable photo when the gathering (the previous blog).

Chiang X3.....

First we must cut our hair by own.

Bathe together in the dirty and smelly toilet

Our dorm ---- Block F. Unfortunately certain called four of us as F4. OMG!!!! Just because we are the only four chinese fellow who live in Block F.

My dormmate - I almost forget all of their name, but I really appreciate to spend 3 months with them.

Here are some memorable photo......

Oh ya!! I won't forget him because he is my team -- Delta's leader. In fact, we are neighbour.Hahah! my bed is next to him.

Yes!! He is Najimi. He always sing the song something like :"....di mata mu, hanyalah...." (is an malay oldish)

smart leh!!!

"Delta Delta number one!!!!"

Ah Wang and Ah Thye are my best friends in the camp. I'm very please to see them in every gathering ( NS reunion in previous blog).

I write down every matter that happened in the whole day in my diary.

It's time to say goodbye......

Ah Keong and me

ah han and me

and also my respectfully jurulatih (forget his name)

My last view on my bed.....honestly, I cry over the leaving....

Ok lah!! Finally show you all some naked photos

; )

Woooo!! What are doing???!!

My National Service members reunion

2007-12-04T19:38:00.000-08:00

Time past by unconsciously, I had leaving the Khidmat Negara (National Service's Camp) almost 3 years. Time and distance may dilute our friendship, but we still try to keep in touch with each other. It's not very tough matter, maybe just simply send a sms or give a call to someone....

For us, have a gathering is more effective. Erm.... we did 3 or 4 times gathering since the end of the camp. Choon Bee who is the middleman in every time of gathering. She willing to spend her time and money to contact us.thanks!!!

Here is the latest gathering at Penang.

Ling Hui, me and Choon Bee in the ferry to Penang Island

After 10 minutes, we arrived at Penang Island and meet the another members......It's lunch time,so they suggest went to Queensbay Mall......

Cheng Wang, one of our driver that trip, very shy.Aiyoh!!!

Like that lah! dont be shy. He is Cheng Wang or some call him big mouth.

Me and Hong Han. We are UMT student. UMT boleh!!!!!!!

Ah Kiong and Choon Bee

Ah Kiong, who is a chef in Hotel Cititel, Penang. Choon Bee call him before the gathering and ask him to take fake medical leave, so that he can join us. OK below is the conversation between ah Kiong and his ah head via handphone in Queensbay mall....

Ah Kiong : "Hallo, ah head oh. Wa hari ni ambil mc ah sebab cirit-birit."
Ah Head : " Ha!!!!! cirit ah!!!Cirit pun boleh kerja mah."
Ah Kiong : " Beh lah!! Wa kentut itu tahi pun boleh keluar oh......."
Ah Head : "@##$%%$"

Hahaha!! 讲骗话不用打草稿。

Ok, continue with Ada, my ex-affair (hahah)

Ada is busy sms her hubby...hohoho

After that, we are watching a idiot and full of fairly tale's movie -- Enchanted. Honestly, it's all because of the girls, otherwise I won't watch the movie. Erm....but it's quiet funny also.

Hang here hang there, it's dinner time. We went to Seoul Garden at Gurney Plaza. RM 39 one person, for me it is too expensive but really enjoy it.

Ah Kiong help me to grill the chicken and some else. I think his occupational disease is outbreak.

Herm...Ho Jia!!!

Laugh like this, must be absolutely delicious lah!!

But!!!! if you ask Pei Qi, she will always show you in the same emotion, so we call emotionless 没表情

Ah Wang what are you doing?? You two people looks like having affair....

We sit at from 7pm until 9.45pm.

Ah Thye who is my best friend when we are in the camp. He is late and looks like a hungry ghost eat and eat, can't stop.

That day, is our friends PeiQI and Guo Han Birthday,it is really coincidently. We celebrate d together.....

make a wish...

You see! Ah Thye is eating the cake

still eat!!!!He is really like a hungry ghost although the ghost month is pass.

say cheese.....

bowwww

Hahaha!!!We ask them to do some 'high-difficulty' action like picked up the candle together

share the same strawberry

even the chocolate

Yeah!!

One more!!!

I hope we can have some more gathering in the future......TQ Choon Bee

And also my ex-affair Ada

百感交集

2007-11-26T00:57:00.000-08:00

不好意识本人的英文粉差，没办法表达出我的想法，所以破天荒的第一次写华文部落格。（有点怪怪的句子）

不知不觉中两年多的时间就这样过了，带着很承重的心情离开了瓜登 --- 一个曾经令我感到陌生好奇--〉渐渐熟悉习惯--〉开始厌倦的地方。在回家的巴士上，一整夜都没睡，异常的月光把窗外的风景照得朦朦胧胧。让我想起前几天跟我的housemates在海边烤番薯。。。。

很不舍得离开那间家，那些housemates。埃！！！本人真的写不下去，那种感觉只有她们懂。再见！

I'm back

2007-11-19T02:19:00.000-08:00

Erm....it's really a very long time didn't update my blog...In fact, I have been drop behind many things that have happened around my friends recently. Why??? just simply because I'm Yang Guo(杨过）these few days......hide inside the tumulus.....

As you know, I prefer indoor activities than the outdoor one. Taiwanese will call the people like me as 宅男，who can stay at home (except go to school else) for a couple weeks. Luckily, I'm still a 'beginner' of 宅男.

Actually there are many freaking stuff can do in the house besides sleep, eat and shit (haha). Such like, watching the latest movie (I like it), listen to the latest release album, reading novel and mag, chitchat with my housemate even my family via skype, surfing internet and blablabla... so sounds like quite busy.haha!

Recently, much tend to be a 宅男 because I wanna spend more time with my loving housemates especially Doreen and Ah Wan, but they seem very busy with their final year's project. But we are promise to each other that we wanna have a gathering every year.

I am lawbreaker these few days

2007-10-25T11:09:00.000-07:00

About 11.30am, my coursemate (a malay girl) sms something like that to me.......

Chan, ni wani budak diploma juga ambil i c chan sekarang kerana chan tertinggal ic dalam bilik peperiksaan.............

Oh shit!!!! I left my I IC in the room without any consciousness. So I replied Wani......

TQ wani. Blh sy pergi rumah wani ambil tak? mana rumah wani?

But she said her house is far away so she will pass my IC to me when the final exam on 30th Oct. I think she don't want me to come to her house perhaps. Aiiii. So pity right? I am very scared every times I went out.....

My funny MUET test --- Speaking

2007-10-24T02:42:00.003-07:00

Today is my MUET speaking test at SMK Bukit Tunggal, it's takes about 20minutes from my house. The test is start on 7.30am, so I wake up at 6.00am early morning. Logically, I got more than 1 hour to prepare before go out. But things will not all right as you expected......

Chiang X3 ......

1st, the heavy rain was unstoppable.....aii.....so i used my housemate's car (TQ Doreen). By then, I drove slowly and carefully because I think I still got time plus it's still raining.

2nd, when I went nearer the school, I noticed that there a very long queue in front.....Oh my god!!At that time is 7.20am, I said to myself it's still early and the test will not start on time.

3rd, huhu!! I arrived at the school on time. fieu!!take a deep breath and walk in the school.......Oh Shit!!!!!!!!!!!! I forget to bring along my SLIP............................ahhhhhhhh

4th, without any deliberation, I start the car and call sean (my housemate) and ask her to send my slip to Saujana (steak house) then I take it from her there. But......I am going freaking crazy again.........because lagi traffic jam....

5th, after many terrible,rude and dangerous driving technique, I arrived the school at 7.50am.Oh!!!!I'm late!!!!!!!!! I have no idea where should I go, so I asked one of the student there:

'Hi kamu tau mana itu untuk ambil peperiksaan muet?' （bloody broken malay)

Then she pointed at the block behind and the third floor. Aiyah!!!so far....

6th, heh! I saw my coursemate (malay girls) also take the same test. Ah Mit Tuo Fo!! the test haven't start yet.hahaha!! so went in the waiting room. Another 4 malay fellow just came after 20 minutes, that mean is almost 8.15am already. Unfortunately, my group is the second last group. So I waiting and waiting until sleep at the waiting room.

7th, when I wake up is almost 9am. I have been shocked by my group members - one malay girl and another one is her brother. They were brought along two Malay-English dictionary, 1 collection of MUET's past year question, 2 books of something like common/daily English conversation, and the another book that really make me wanna laugh in front them.Ok I give you 3 seconds to guess....

3

2

1

The answer is ...... SPM literature Q&A exercise book .hahaha! The malay girl keep doing and reading the exercise book, she seem very hardworking very smart, but for me, she is particularly stupid. Who will ask you the poem or novel in your MUET speaking test oh!!!!hahah!!

By the way, her brother the another 'cute' person ask me to help him when the group discussion. So to be honest, I told him that my English is very poor too. Then I keep sleeping while they were.......hahaha!!!

Ting X2

Our turn already!!!!my heartbeat Pu TomX2

The question is:

Which of the following is the worst effect of the war
a) destroy life
b) destroy property
c) the economy affect
d) the environment affect

our task is to discuss the worst effect

The cutie brother asked the examiner what the meaning of the word 'destroy'. Oh!!!! I think examiner is shock that time. Adverse, she (the examiner) answer him with soft and gentle voice and asked him whether understand the meaning already or not.

He shake his head and said nop .... the nice examiner explain in Bahasa and continue asked :' Do you understand the question??' He replied in Bahasa :' tak faham.'

After 2minutes, time to individual presentation. The examiner ask the candidate A, the cutie to start. But he still keep writing and writing.... The examiner said again very slowly, word by word:' you can speak now.' with some hand language.

A couple minutes later, is our group discussion. I start first and show my opinion and my choice, the economy affect because this and that.Bla bla bla. They all agree with me then tried to say or rather to say they read the words from the question paper that I totally can't understand. I wanna help them when they were stuck or speechless, I try my best to understand what they meant but I fail.

Obviously the result was come out already, it's only take 4 minutes, so how about the another 4 minutes, what should I talk about......So I talk to the sister can we discuss a little bit about the factor cause the war. I saw her innocent face and continued with :'In your opinion, why the war occur?' She replied with many english single words but I still understand. Erm....until I heard the word 'parents', I almost lost self control to laugh.

Their parents will cause the war?!!! Luckily my parents won't .heheh!!

Union Digital Station

2007-10-20T03:27:00.000-07:00

Heh! everyone. It's a long time I haven't update my blog......

Ok! the story start from a couple months before, I bought a latest model of Sony mp3 player in Union Motor (a popularity and high reputation shop in KT). The boss there Mr.Chua explained about the mp3 detailed even though he was very busy at the moment.

After paying, Mr.Chua suddenly asked：

"Chan, do you interested to be a part timer in our new brunch in Giant during the raya festival??"

Waooo!!!My heartbeat was speed up and Pu Tom Pu Tom suddenly.

"Sure!" I replied

So have been working 2 days part time in Union Digital Station with my buddy, Ah Hien.有福同享，有难同当，thats why I ask him to work together.hahaha!!

Union Digital Station- The best digital camera shop in KT.

I will show some pretty cool digital camera with my professional poses.hahaa!! (for the detail please surf to Ah Hien's blog)

First, the Sony cameras really impressed me when I stepped in the shop. OMG!!All the Sony cameras are particularly great in design with 2 or 3 colours option. They are looking at me and said:"Buy me! Buy me!"

Sony T200 - RM16XX

Sony T70 - RM 14XX

Nikon RM 4XXX (I forget the model)

and
>
>
>
Dang X3........

The Sony H6 or H7 (sorry I forget the model already, anyway I love it) RM16XX
I love it because it got 15X optical zoom, that mean you can take some 'memorable' pictures in even in a long distance.huhu!! Besides, Kennysia(top blogger in Malaysia) also own one similar camera. I'm very envy......

I think the Sony company should invite me as their Sony ambassador.Hehe!!erm......at least 5 digit per year lah.huhu. See，the healthiness and energy image.I guarantee the sales of Sony camera will be increase at least 3 times if pick me as Sony ambassador.Ok,right. This is my contact number 012-471xxxx. Heheee.....

Another pose. Cakak!!

I catch you!!!!

Ah Hien and Eric (supervisor)

Oh!before I forget. Special thanks to our supervisor, Eric Soon. Thanks for everything you have taught me and Ah Hien. Ok,To show my appreciation, I will introduce Eric in my blog soon. This is the most pleasure job that I ever did.TQ

Memorable picture......

Our boat's name D'COFYN derived from.......

2007-10-13T20:29:00.000-07:00

A long time ago, there were a wise captain and his two sailors were survived from a ship disaster in the Ocean X. After one day drifting, they found an island and live at there.

They tried to build up a boat so that they could leave the island and back to the land. But they met many problem adversely......

First, they couldn't found a hammer besides the woods is particularly solid if compare to the normal woods.

Then one of the sailor step wood board incautiously

Even thought, they mange to build up something like.........coffin

Suddenly, the captian's buttock was in pain......ahah!!

After that, he fall into a faint and pass away.......(cheh x2)

Yen, the sailor who step the board , smear her tears and go forward to present the captain......

...one truss of grass.

The another sailor Sean was sit on chair beside the coffin sorrowfully.

To commemorate their grandness captain, they decide to name the boat as D'COFYN

Nicky李玖哲

2007-10-13T18:29:00.000-07:00

When i say Nicky李玖哲, maybe some of you don't know who is he. Never mind i will tell you

As i know, he is a Korean singer who can sing well, but doesn't make him to be famous in Korea last time because he is a fatso with a pair of -_- eyes. After that, he met Jeff(Machi 大哥) and join in MACHI, 小胖子 as his nickname.

小胖子 in MACHI

After less his body weight, Nicky start release his 1st album-影子 and 2nd album-Baby 是我. Above all, he won the best male singer in 18届金曲奖 in Jun 2007. Cheer!!!

See my Jolin won the best female singer that time.haha!!

Recently, he release his latest album-想太多. Despite he is not handsome or looks smart, he is able to sing soulfully and certain song like 解脱，我会好好过，我忘了，Baby是我 and the new song 想太多 bloody touching and deserved my tears sometimes.....

My causin--AH HAO who is in Shah Alam now. I have a long time no see him.erm....since Chinese New Year last year. Suddenly i notice that Ah Hao looks alike Nicky because they looks like 'strong' and -_- eyes. haha!!

80% similitude from these two picture. (actual person is more resemble than the pic)

The making of D'COFYN

2007-10-11T16:44:00.000-07:00

Ok, let's start with reviewing the making of D'COFYN........

We 'collect' wood frame from somewhere......hehe!!

and pick up another 2 floats from the pound.

While Kenn and Yen working hard and worry out how to solve the problems we met......

We are fighting (play abdminton).....

Next day, we moved all the material to campus

Tied the frame together with the floats

Try the buoyancy and balancing of the 2 floats. Our experiment start with the lowest weight 5X kg(ah Hien)

Bingo!!We get it.

But for me 6X kg weight, the floats is unbalance, goyang-goyang. So our experiment show that our boat only can support the weight less than 60 kg. But Kenn doesn't think so.....

He also wanna try.....
as you know the floats is sinking....haha!!Kenn no offence.

Friend = Clothing

2007-10-09T03:24:00.000-07:00

Friend, for me is can be compare to or imagine as clothing. Once you step out of the door, you need 'clothing' .......even come back home (unless you like to undress or naked).

How do i categorize my friends????

Buddy?

Playmate?

Coursemate?

Housemate?

colleague?

or the people we know each other? (friends??)

In my opinion, to be friend doesn't need any criteria or reason, just feel joy and comfortable, but need certain mutual topic to hala. So try to fit in yourself with a comfortable 'clothing'!! You ought to be ourself, not try to make up to someone and lost yourself. It is the meaning of friend!!

So Ai Yuan (my best friend), just be yourself ok?

I don't have many friends before (even now) because I am such an endocentric, diffident, pessimistic, self-abasement and low-pitched person. I don't like crowded place, but prefer to have a coffee in coffee house instead. But after came to KUSTEM, my life is totally changed..... live with 2 extravert roomate + coursemate and start be join certain activities......

I don't know what should I 'wear' that time....Erm.....now I realize I should 'wear' depend on the occasion and how I 'wear' it.Haha! Do you understand what I mean?

WPC Welfare's agm

2007-10-04T08:47:00.000-07:00

As a former president of WPC Welfare, i would like to thanks for everyone (Buddhist society also) who have been take part in every welfare's activities and give commitment since last year.TQ！

Erm... I have learned much more knowledge that we wont be learn in the text book. Appreciate for giving the chance to experience it, even though it was bloody tough when the beginning (i confess that i wanna give up during the beginning stage.)

Time past by unconsciously, is time to AGM. Miss Chua (or rather Miss Shanghai) is my ideal successor to be the president. Jia You!!! Special thanks to Yi Jun who is goodness girl that i ever seen before and thanks for everything she did for welfare.

I think i am older and older after writing this blog ...... all of the members say i looks older than my exact age. They wont believe me until i show my identity card to them. Haiz!!!

Ok lah!! Finally, I hope Miss Chua can handle it and do better than me. I know she will!!